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psychological abuse / gaslighting / medical abuse / psychiatry / anti-psychiatry 

First-off: this is heavy stuff.

Back home from my appointment with a well-trained psychiatrist.

It's 100% surreal, and the denial is kicking my ass today.

I'm having a hard time accepting that I was given medication not because I needed it, but because my childhood abuser was able to manipulate my psychiatrist into diagnosing me with something I don't actually have, and prescribing a medication which I didn't actually need.

Bipolar disorder is not:

Anxiety / PTSD / night terrors / losing sleep due to adversity, and struggling to navigate the unhealthy boundaries and demands of an abusive caretaker.

Mania [or the shorter duration version: hypomania] is not the same as being too afraid and hypervigilant to sleep restfully.

Bipolar disorder is not:

Feeling hopeless and demoralized, and living a joyless life because you're afraid to inconvenience / provoke your abuser.

Depression due to a chemical imbalance is different than losing hope in life because there's no evidence / rational reason to believe the abuse will stop.

Bipolar disorder is not:

An accurate diagnosis [in my case]... it was a falsehood used for justification / manipulation for my abuser to get me to take medication which would make it easier to continue abusing me.

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