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Dear white, male, cis, straight allies in tech: We need you out there de-radicalizing your racist, sexist techbros friends and coworkers (who are much more likely to listen to you than any of us) more than we need your code. Thank you.

@jaycie I’m not white but sometimes I feel guilty because I feel like maybe I could try to help stop the radicalization of people around me. But I know how hostile they are at this point even to moderate social positions like respecting people’s pronouns and viewing people in communist countries as human. I’m acutely aware of the ableism embedded into their whole worldview. I do not want to be within the blast radius of potential retaliation if/when I “reveal my power level”

@capefeather Situations like yours are exactly why I included so many qualifiers. Speaking as someone whose mom homeschooled them to try and indoctrinate them into creationism, I empathize.

@v0idifier Good rule of thumb: Am I making room for marginalized people - who usually know what they want and need better than anyone else - to fix their own problems, or am I trying to fix the problems I think they have on my own?

Often summarized as "Solidarity over charity."

@jaycie making people not discriminate/be a piece of shit to them would be giving them room right? this makes a lot of sense

@v0idifier Exactly. One example: Volunteering to take over some moderation duties from the marginalized mod of a fediverse instance (with the caveat that you would be at least as aggressive with blocking as they are), as opposed to trying to write a script to automate the moderation work (which bad actors tend to subvert and exploit anyway).

@jaycie hm, I understand where you're going with the example but I can't completely make a distinction of charity/solidarity. only one I can see is human/code

@v0idifier Giving people code they didn't specifically ask for: charity. Providing requested labor for people to free them up so they can write their own code: solidarity.

@jaycie I think I got the concept. I don't encounter this type of situations right now, but I will try to apply this if I have one. tysm, you made me think

@jaycie one more thing. I think this kind of guidance of what's actually helpful or not is really useful for us, The Cis :tm:. (@ everyone) don't think we all know what do you want or need. if you can't say it that's fine, but if you can please consider it.

@v0idifier Blanket statements made by the marginalized about the misconceptions of the less marginalized can be interpreted as statements more about the social systems that enable and foster such ignorance more than about any specific members of that less-marginalized group.

That, and specific helpful actions speak louder to an individual's exclusion from those complaints than any general denials.

@jaycie I didn't understand the last sentence, you meant inclusion?

@v0idifier That was another way of saying "Show us specific actions privileged individuals are taking to distinguish themselves from their group rather than tell us that such individuals theoretically exist."

Or, "Not all cis" doesn't sound any better than "Not all men."

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