super cool how inpatient mental health treatment is so fucking universally awful and traumatizing that the mere mention of it is a trigger and can send me into a complete tailspin, thus risking another inpatient stay and yet more trauma 🙃🙃🙃
I keep switching back and forth between "under no condition whatsoever will I go to residential care" and "fuck it I'm gonna end up there anyway so it might as well be voluntary"
sui, mh inpatient
really my preferred option would be to just fucking die, but I've proven pretty conclusively that I can't actually pull that off, so 🤷