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new rule for myself

i do not get to criticize something unless i have done a lot of research into how and why it works, and also how it came to be

there is almost always more to it than the immediately apparent, and there might be interesting opportunities in either the thing itself or in the components that comprise the thing applied in a different way

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i quit being human some time ago, now i'm something more and something less. by my own choice and my own hand, even.

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locking my account for now, out of caution. please be someone i've interacted with in the past and poke me if you want to follow for some reason

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also, hey.

just so y'all are clear: this isn't an alt. this is my new main. ^_^;

even if it looks functionally the same as my old one on cybre.space

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obvious hot take, meta 

btw, if i didn't make this clear enough: if you do not think otherkin or furries or queer people are valid, if you don't think that people have a right to self-authorship and insist that all we can ever be is one kind of thing, then you are not my comrade.

i feel like the very boundary between myself and the world is a very ill-defined and illusory thing, and that feels very distressing

in what respect can i be said to even exist as a self? there's clearly something that is mine as much as anything even can be, but...

if i consider parts of the world to be wicked and terrible, i consider parts of myself to be too. and i will forever be in conflict with myself.

how does one live like this?

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this is very much in contradiction with some of my own feelings, and probably a lot of y'all, but...

one of the greatest lies is that of the self-made person. that we can go anywhere, be anything, by our own decisions alone.

and maybe in a conceptual vacuum, you could. but we live in a world with history and cause and effect and needs and dependencies.

anything that we can be said to make of ourselves, isn't ever entirely up to us, because everything we have and everything we are came from somewhere else.

even the very will to remake is not really ours. not entirely. what does that even mean?

i often end up appreciating the villains and other characters in things that i'm "not supposed to" appreciate

usually when the heroes are utterly square or unlikeable

getting a little too comfortable and complacent with the idea that everything is, at least in theory, amenable to discrete analysis and recombination and grand structural planning... because in the world you spend a lot of time in, those things get you pretty far.

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speaking really only for myself...

programmer brain is a hell of a thing

misskey has the right idea

who needs upvotes or faves when you can 🍮 instead

if you've read glitch rpg, then maybe it'll make sense if i say that transitioning is going from eide 0 to ... more than that.

had that rare experience of running into an online clinic for hrt... for cis people.

and like... my dude, it's dope you want to optimize bodies. for some of us, it's the opposite set our bodies produce that works best.

it's like... you almost get it

make use of the fact that you are Not The Average Person

mathematically im not fucking around & after the //WORK// ive done these past 8 years, i am //BEYOND// insulted and furious with my parents

did they sleep on concrete and have to wake up at 5am to go to their full-time job?

no. they havent.

//I'VE// learned "good work ethic", and their bullshit delusional "beliefs" might get me, vanta, orum, and rebi killed

so please, if you can boost or donate (even $2) i would be //HIGHLY GRATEFUL//

ko-fi.com/fairydoctor

if youd like a commission DM me

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today i got a sense of just how much fucking magic x86 processors today have baked in, and no wonder it backfires

blog.cloudflare.com/branch-pre

pros to dating kit:

  • pretty cute
  • constant snuggles if you want it, easily pulled into more
  • open-minded and accepting of a lot of things, will always hear you out
  • can hold an interest in the most off-the-wall things
  • can, in fact, fix your printer

cons to dating kit:

  • sometimes emotionally distant, hard to approach, coming off cold
  • prone to depression (but getting better)
  • will probably forget important things
  • it will be a slow burn kind of relationship

re: help request, income and housing situations. :boost_ok:​ 

continued update:

we have, like, some amount of freelance web design income, but not much - we can scrape together what we need to help out. if anyone could take in a disabled system, ideally either near the chicago area (we'd prefer to end up there) or somewhere nearish to atlanta (currently in the area as is), we'd appreciate it.

our parents that we're stuck with are going to be moving to a new house through the month of May, and we will be pulled into helping with this in ways we cannot physically handle, and we already know they're not considering us and our wheelchair and fucked leg at all, given they're picking out entirely multi-story homes.

if you wanna help us out with income, weld.eerie.garden/support is the way to go, and recurrent donation methods, mainly Patreon, go a long way towards making us sure we're kinda stable.

#TransCrowdFund #MutualAidRequest #MutualAid

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zine with advice for helping folks who are feeling suicidal 

This short document is a universe better than the entire "Mental Health First Aid" training program I've been subtweeting

"helping your friends who sometimes wanna die maybe not die."

tinylantern.net/suicide-interv

i can relate to franz kafka more than i figured, and i don't know how to feel about that

Gonna say this one time.

I don’t post this stuff because I am looking for someone to tell me there’s not a scholarly article, or a deeper dive. I post it because of trends I have seen in the reporting of day to day events, and emerging threats.

I didn’t get here on scholarly articles on emerging threats

As this one gets closer to being truly weaponized… You need to know that SPECTRE and Meltdown cannot be patched..

threatpost.com/attacks-slaught

meant as a funpost 

fuck you

*unmixes your messaging*

"We hold that settlerism is the historic instrument created by the European ruling classes to safeguard their colonial conquests with entire, imported populations of European invaders. In return for special privileges and a small share of the colonial loot these settlers became the loyal, live-in garrison troops of Empire over us. As such they objectively side with our oppressors and become imperialism’s willing servants. Everywhere they are filled with white supremacy, national chauvinism, and a hatred and fear of the oppressed. So that in South Afrika, in Palestine, and right here in the U.S. Empire, the Revolution objectively is locked in battle with the European settler masses. On this matter there is no choice."

any day i can show someone the anarchist library is a good day

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